I login to YouTube Studio to check my analytics.

Crossed 50,000 views… goodie

Crossed 500 watch time hours… excellent…

Almost 2,000 channel subscribers….perfect…

Then I pop over to the community tab to check the comments.

And I sh*t you not, this is the first comment I read:

“stole your portfolio , landed my first client wit it , thankss “

I sit there for a few seconds staring at my phone…

I re-read the comment to make sure I read it right…

Stole my portfolio?

Landed a client with my portfolio???

WOULD YOU LOOK AT THAT! 😳

My eyes as wide as a cocaine addict at this point.

I open the door to my home office looking for my wife…

-ADRI! LOOK AT THIS!!

-What!? What happened!?

-READ THIS! This guy STOLE my portfolio and landed a client with it.

-DON’T DO THAT! I THOUGHT THE KIDS WERE HURT OR SOMETHING!

-Oh, yes! Where are the kids?

-Upstairs playing.

-Perfect… KIDS! Look at this!

I hustle up the stairs to show them!

-Sweet lucaaaa, look at what daddy has son… look at this little NPC, my boy. A little troll online has stolen daddy’s portfolio to land a client, what do you think of that my boy?

My 3-year-old keeps building his legos as if I’m not even there... 🤦

-Exactly son, he’s not even worth your time is he son? A little pleb isn’t he my boy?

I turn to my 9-year-old Hailey.

-Hailey, Princess, what do you think about this? Somebody STOLE daddy’s portfolio to land a client.

-What’s a portfolio?

-Good question sweetie, it’s a collection of my best writing to show clients who want to work with me.

-Isn’t that illegal? To steal?

-Not only is it illegal sweet pea, it’s downright IDIOTIC! What do you think of that?

-Dumb daddy. You should call the police on him!

-Ah genius idea, sweet pea. Genius idea.

I turn to my 5-year-old Liam.

-Liam, my boy! You hear that? Daddy’s gonna call the police on this IMBECILE who has STOLEN Daddy’s portfolio to get a client! What do you think my boy? Should we do that!?

-Why didn’t he pay you for it Dad?

-Because it’s not for sale son.

-So how did he steal it?

-Well you see my boy, he LIED! He took my writing and told other people that HE wrote it. Which he clearly did NOT because he is no GOAT. You understand?

-He should buy it from you dad.

-No no. Son. I don’t want his money. I want his HEAD!!

-Uhhh I mean, daddy will take care of Mr. Troll, don’t you worry.

-What’s a troll, dad?

-Half the internet. Okay son, daddy’s gotta go back to work! Love you kids!

-LOVE YOU DAD!

And I pitter-patter my way back to my office…

I plop back into my office chair and type out this reply:

“What happens when they find out you can’t write like me? 😏”

Or better yet… what happens when that client finds the real me? :)

I’m coming for ya.

I’m coming for that client.

And when they see that you’re just some AI clone of me and not the real thing, it’s gonna be SOOOOOOO obvious.

Get ready my man. I’m coming to eat your breakfast, lunch and dinner. And second dinner. And second breakfast.

Like a little hobbit.

NUM NUM NUM!

Here I come...

NUM NUM!

But listen…

The only way to get the REAL AUTHENTIC El Copy Goat to write for you is by hiring Dragu Fitterman and Co.

My Email Marketing Micro-Agency.

That’s it.

I don’t contract. I don’t freelance. And I don’t steal other people’s writing to put into ChatGPT to rip off.

​www.dragufittermanand.co​

The only real me ^^

Your copywriting friend,

Alin “Takes Down Internet NPCs” Dragu